Matthew 19:4b-5 “at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’.
Dr. Freda Bush and Dr. Joe McIlhaney are Obstetrician/Gynecologists and co-authors of “Girls Uncovered” and “Hooked”. In these books they uncover the disturbing trend of “casual sex” and the devastating impact on our young people. One area of particular insight is their description of the brain chemistry behind sexual activity. They describe the neurochemicals that are created with any sexual activity; this includes viewing pornography, masturbation, oral sex and actual sexual intercourse.
One chemical that is created with sexual activity is dopamine and it is created in the pre-frontal cortex of the brain, the area of the brain where you make decisions – your area of judgement. One huge danger of pre-marital sex is that the pre-frontal cortex isn’t fully matured until an adult’s mid-twenties, yet teenagers are making sexual decisions now. Bathed in powerful dopamine, which sends rewards signals which desire more, these young people do not have the emotional ability to handle these feelings and their judgement is impaired.
Two other neurochemicals produced are oxytocin in females and vasopressin in males. They are incredible chemical bonding agents. Oxytocin in females actually causes her to trust her partner and binds her to the partner emotionally. Vasopressin produced in males (often called the monogamy chemical) causes bonding to their partner and remarkably causes an attachment to their offspring. With an understanding of these two chemical bonding agents, Jesus’ words in Matthew 19 hold even greater meaning. Quoting from Genesis 1:27 and 2:24, Jesus described God’s plan for marriage and procreation, and it is awesome. When he says that the “two will become one flesh”, it becomes so much more meaningful with an understanding of oxytocin and vasopressin.
Drs. Bush and McIlhaney share great concerns for today’s youth because while these neurochemicals have such incredible bonding power, unfortunately they work much like a band-aid. The more often they are applied and torn away, the less they stick. So “casual sex” is anything but that. Beyond the very serious and real dangers of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), young people are abusing strong “God-given” chemical reactions intended to bond them together with their future spouse. Society is putting pressure on them, selling them very short of God’s awesome design intended to beautifully bond together a couple, and God-willing their children.
As athletes you may enjoy success, and with that popularity you may also encounter temptations. While the world calls it “casual sex”, “friends with benefits”, “no strings attached”, recognize the awesome thing that God created, and make wise decisions today that will allow this beautiful gift to be all that it was intended to be in the confines of a loving, God-blessed marital relationship. Do not sell yourself, your future spouse or children short.
If you have sinned in this area of sexual purity, recognize that you serve a merciful savior. Digest this scripture: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Begin by confessing your sins to the Lord and then quickly accept his promised forgiveness; the awesome creator of this neurochemical miracle, will “purify you” and he can recreate the awesome bonding that he intended. Re-consecrate yourself today, make a renewed commitment of purity to God, and watch him do an awesome work in your life, which will one day allow you to enjoy all God intended for you and your spouse.